Don't you wish you can just get in the car and just drive? I am tapped out. I am tired of oozing milk even when I'm not nursing. M just has been torturous to her little brother. Instead of team tagging me, they double body slam me.
I went out with my best friend on Friday and they were still in the back of my mind. Is he okay? Is he awake? Is he well fed? I have yet to pick up a pump yet. I need to find a place to rent one. My reasoning for procrastinating is that I wasn't able to pump with M. I would pump for half an hour and only get an ounce. Perhaps the days I want to pump I'll take some sort of lactation support for the whole day.
With M, I was okay with being a mom twenty four seven. Now I'm ready to get my sanity back. I don't know where I left it. Perhaps it's' in my freezer along with the placenta. Or maybe the vampires stole it. Is there sanity in my precious milk? Is there a refresh button somewhere?
And let's talk about my looks. I have no clothes that fit me. The clothes that do are tattered and torn. I hate my hair cut. My mom "fixed" it and now it looks as though I can clean the floors with it. I feel like a blow fish half of the time the other half is because I hate to see what I look like in a mirror.
It used to be that I could surf a bit and feel better. Now it sucks. I hope to have some time to myself soon. I would love to go shopping and I have never been a shopper. I'm just tired of looking like a street urchin like my mom tells me. Next date with myself I would scrapbook. Ironically, it would be about my kids. They may be vampires but they are sure damn cute ones.
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3 comments:
So good to know I'm not alone in feeling like this- not that I'd wish it for someone else. It has gotten a bit better as Corryn will entertain herself for short periods of time.
And it sounds like time with mom was not the best for the self esteem. I think your hair looks great. You look like a tired mom with a new baby (AND a toddler) but not a street urchin.
As if on cue- corryn calls...
Thanks so much Wendy, I know what you mean about nice to know that you're not the only one. I guess misery does love company? Anyways, maybe we can grab some lunch/diiner/drinks out sometime sans kids. Hope to get a pump soon!
Aha, so that's where my sanity went! It's behind the years-old placenta still in my freezer. ;) Thanks for letting me know.
I'm sorry to hear you're feeling stretched. :( I feel like that sometimes with one, so I can only imagine how some moments/days may be with you.
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